


Ticking Time for Two

by toganeshiro



Series: Happy Akigetsu [4]
Category: Given (Manga)
Genre: Alternate Reality, Character Development, Character Study, M/M, Relationship Study, Self-Acceptance, WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED, ugetsu is happy, ugetsu laughs a lot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:54:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24232405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toganeshiro/pseuds/toganeshiro
Summary: The sound of the ticking clock kept ringing in his ears. Every second, it’s ticking, loud and bursting his eardrums. His head started to throb and the next thing he knew; the plastic cover of the clock had been cracked and shattered, the hand unmoving, and one of the beer cans was already on the floor and leaking out foam.He didn’t need to be reminded every second of how time was slowly moving away from their simple happiness.The sound of silence rang in his ears. But it was what he preferred.
Relationships: Kaji Akihiko/Murata Ugetsu
Series: Happy Akigetsu [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1534127
Comments: 13
Kudos: 23





	Ticking Time for Two

Kaji Akihiko.

A man from his high school years. With violin playing style as gentle as his features, his long delicate fingers pressing firmly on each string and creating such kind melody. Even with his eyebrows in a frown and sharp eyes; his first impression was that this man was a fragile-looking person.

A student from neighbouring class, who visited him lot after class hours. Most students were busy hanging out or practising in their club rooms. But this man stayed with him in this abandoned music room instead of the one used by the other students on the opposite building.

He thought that would be it.

Two paragraphs.

It should’ve been enough space to tell his story about _Kaji Akihiko_.

He thought it’d be a name he’d one day forget, and only remember once he’d turn back the pages. Looking back at his past as he reminisced about his younger days.

But he had been mistaken.

 _Akihiko_.

A name so familiar on his lips.

He’d utter that name, sometimes, on mornings when he’d been too sleepy and needed another minute to sleep. Or in a sweet voice as he asked that man to do yet another chore for him. Other times it’s when they’re arguing, and the words that followed after that name had never been kind words. While then in the next few days, he’d probably be back to sensually calling that name as he pant in pleasure.

Most of the times though, it’s on days when he’s alone in his apartment.

Softly, in trembling voice, as if he’s a child who had been abandoned.

In a room so messy with broken glass and scattered papers, light turned off and not even a sound could come in from outside. _Akihiko_ , he would call out that name, as he stared at the broken clock hanging high on the wall.

It has been broken for years.

After he ended their relationship right before Akihiko’s performance, he came back alone that day.

Putting down his violin case beside their bed, he could see Akihiko’s clothes were still scattered messily together with the bed sheets. He turned to the kitchen, and found both their cups were still unwashed in the sink. Some simple ingredients Akihiko used in his meals were in the fridge when he opened it to take out his beer.

He took a few cans out, and put them down on the coffee table. It was a long night.

He sat down and opened the can, yet it tasted bland. His apartment reeked of Akihiko. And it’s quiet.

 _Too_ quiet.

The sound of the ticking clock kept ringing in his ears. Every second, it’s ticking, loud and bursting his eardrums. His head started to throb and the next thing he knew; the plastic cover of the clock had been cracked and shattered, the hand unmoving, and one of the beer cans was already on the floor and leaking out foam.

He didn’t need to be reminded every second of how time was slowly moving away from their simple happiness.

The sound of silence rang in his ears. But it was what he preferred.

It chained him to that room, caged him and making him unaware of the time. Sometimes he would forget and they’d act like lovers again; being all happy and oblivious. Then after some time had passed, he’d remember that they had broken up and do things to make Akihiko leave him.

And repeat.

It’s a cycle that kept repeating.

But, it should’ve been different now.

He definitely took that step to break out of that cycle, didn’t he?

He slaps away the cover and sits on the edge of the bed. It’s hard to breathe and his stomach churns. He’s feeling nauseous.

The silence used to relax him. Yet now it’s only numbing. It feels like he’s back on those days; of the days when he sat in complete silence in this tiny enclosed room as he waited for Akihiko to open that door. 

He grabs his phone and coat before he rushes to the door and leaves the apartment.

There’s no way he can bear sitting alone for another second in there.

.

 **ugetsu** I’m at convenience store near the station and forgot to bring my wallet  
 **ugetsu** save me (:

And he taps on the send button.

It feels easier to breathe now. The store is still quite crowded despite the hour since it’s close to the station, but his nausea is starting to go away now. He’s crouching down on one of the aisles and fiddles with the button on the side of his phone.

Akihiko has a practise session with his band mates today, but it should’ve been over by now.

When his phone vibrates in his hand, he quickly taps the screen to check it.

 **akihiko** go back and get your wallet

 **ugetsu** don’t wanna

The screen fades out to black and he taps on it to light up the screen again. Akihiko doesn’t seem to be replying even though it’s already marked as read. But he doesn’t even need to wait that long before Akihiko shows up and pays for his cigarettes.

.

“Akihiko!” he half shouts, despite the road being almost empty. Akihiko is driving in high speed and it may be hard for him to hear his voice. His arms grip tight around Akihiko and he inhales, “the wind feels nice, I don’t wanna go home yet!”

“Huh?” Akihiko replies, his head half turned to him while still keeping his eyes focused on the road, “where do you wanna go then? It’s almost midnight.”

Where, indeed.

He hasn’t given a thought about it. It’s just a sudden impulse, since they’re always spending time at home. It’s not like he doesn’t like their home, it’s a perfect place for him. But, he overslept today and missed Akihiko in the morning, and Akihiko’s schedule is packed for the day, so he was left alone in that room for the whole day. And he doesn’t really feel like spending time in there at the moment.

He leans away from Akihiko, still gripping tight on Akihiko’s jacket to prevent himself from falling. The night is quiet and the only sound he hears is the rumble of Akihiko’s bike. He stares blankly at the sky. The moon shines bright today and only a few stars are visible. It feels weird, looking at the vast sky like this. Since they’re used to spending their time in their apartment.

“I don’t know. Somewhere.”

This time, his voice is softer. But he believes Akihiko heard him when Akihiko picks up the speed all of a sudden. Being alone with Akihiko, just the two of them, on his bike and he doesn’t even know where they’re going.

“This is like a date!” he shouts. And this time a laugh escapes his lips together with the words he utters. He can’t control it and it feels something is threatening to burst out from his chest. His stomach tickles and he can’t stop laughing now.

Every moment with Akihiko feels like he could just die at any moment from being too happy laughing.

Akihiko ignores him, but that is fine. By now, Akihiko is probably used to being dragged around by him. He pulls in closer to Akihiko, leaning on to his warm back and hugs him tight, letting his skin burns on the places that comes into contact.

“It _is_ a date, dummy.”

The voice is soft and it’s almost inaudible, but he hears it alright. “Are you really calling a prodigy like me a _dummy_?” he laughs, and his stomach hurts from doing it too much. But he likes it.

The time passes and they do not exchange any words any more, but he can guess his lips are still smiling from how sore his cheeks are.

Ah, this place seems familiar.

Oh, right. He almost jumps from his seat, “Stop here!” he points to the open space in front of them, making Akihiko pulling the brake suddenly and they both bumps together on his back. Good thing no one’s following behind them or they’ll receive complaints for stopping so suddenly.

He jumps down immediately when the bike comes to a full stop and removes his helm, giving it to Akihiko.

“Wha―where are you going?”

He runs following the path and skips a little, with both his hands in the pocket of his coat. His feet bring him to a park he recalls they had visited years in the past. Akihiko took a picture of him at that time and he’s still using it for his official social media account’s profile photo.

The path itself is full of dried maple leaves. He breathes in the scent of autumn and catches one of falling leaves in his hand as it falls.

He raises them up and when he looks at it, he can see the big tree behind it.

The quietness of the night feels lonely, and so he finds himself humming before he even realise it.

It is one of the pieces he learnt when he first started violin. A song with cheerful tune and simple notes. He can hear Akihiko’s footsteps behind him, tailing him with the same speed he walks with.

“Why here?” Akihiko asks.

“Hm,” is there any reason behind his actions today, really? He throws away the leaf in his hand and looks around; this place still looks the same as that time. Except it’s in the middle of the night and they’re the only ones here this time. The big tree in the middle of the park is still there, along with the long bench right under it.

He remembers that’s where they sat back then.

It was their first date.

At least, the first one that was not at school or convenience store.

He turns around and the wind blows strong, he slips his hair behind his ear and notices how Akihiko seems to be unbothered by his sudden requests tonight. It really is the same scenery, turning around and seeing Akihiko with him here. And he’s also feeling the same emotion right now as when he stood here years ago.

Being with Akihiko is always making him overflowed with happiness.

He laughs, his vision turns blurry from how hard he’s laughing right now. He laughs. And really, he can’t stop it.

“Because, I like autumn.”

The slight blush on Akihiko’s cheek is noticeable even in this late at night. Akihiko stops his feet at his track and a slight gasp comes out from his mouth.

The smell of the dried leaves, smoky and crisp. And the breezy wind that blows on them, it’s not too hot like summer. Neither is it freezing. It smells like their first date.

And slowly, he turns back to the pages of his high school days.

The story about Kaji Akihiko never ended after those two paragraphs. It continued. Until it fills up that page, then the next one, and the next one after that. Ever since then, and up until this point, his pages are still filled with that name.

The dried leaves crush under his feet when he skips towards the bench under that big tree. He hops up and stands on it.

He turns around to Akihiko, and again, Akihiko is looking at him with those green eyes that glint like he’s in a daze.

With how he’s standing on a taller ground and looking at Akihiko from above, he feels like standing on a stage. It’s quiet, just like before a performance begins and the audience is waiting for the conductor to start. Heart thumping, ready to immerse themselves in beautifully orchestrated music pieces and his violin performance.

It’s a stage under moonlight and the falling red leaves as his orchestral accompaniment. He stands tall, detached from the rest of the scenery, because when he plays the violin, he’s the centre of attention.

“Aki, watch,” he smiles.

His hands rise up in a swift motion imitating holding a violin in his hand, and a bow on the other. His third finger does a short vibrato on the nonexistent string as he bows the first note. And he can hear it clear in his ears.

Minuet in G major.

It’s a simple piece.

One of his favourites when he was young, it’s also the same melody he hummed when they had just arrived here. There is no single miss made, on each time he moves his finger to place it on another string. Or the amount pressure he’s putting on his bow. All he could hear is the nostalgic melody.

The violin on his shoulder feels lighter than usual, but it does not matter. He is one with the violin. Each melody the violin creates is an extension of himself. He can feel the sensation on his finger each time he bows on the string, it vibrates lightly. And the note he plays sounds clean when his body remembers the angle he needs to bow on each note.

When he comes to the last measure and finishes it with a clear credenza, his sweat trickles down his forehead.

He opens his eyes and only then he notices the quietness of the night and the wind is their only company. The air smells earthy; it certainly smells different from his usual stage. The light violin suddenly makes sense now, since he is never holding one on his shoulder in the first place.

He lowers his hands and meets his eye with Akihiko.

In the middle of this big park, Akihiko stands there alone with his hands inside his pocket. His shoulder slack and mouth slightly agape, while his eyes are staring at him with the exact same expression he had when they first met. As if he had fallen in love, again.

You see, Akihiko has never tried to hide who he liked behind his expression.

It shows.

That’s why it terrified him.

But Akihiko’s love is not here to take away violin from him. And he knows no matter how much he loves Akihiko, he is one with violin. He will never stop loving music. There’s nothing that can scare him now.

He flashes a smile, “so, what did I play just now?”

Akihiko blinks a few times. He inhales sharply and clears his throat. “I don’t know,” he says, almost breathless, “only a genius like you would know just from that.”

He laughs, “well, you’re not wrong.”

The step Akihiko takes crushes the leaves under his feet, then another step, and he’s closing their distance. He stares straight at him from down below, his gaze is piercing yet gentle. Akihiko has always been gentle.

Akihiko hops on the bench just like him and now they’re both standing on it. He inhales, and when he looks around, he can see the big tree behind them. The moon shines bright and the sky looks so far away.

And being alone in this big space that he is not used to, he seems so small and honestly it’s quite scary.

But he looks to his side and Akihiko is there.

Standing with him.

He smiles, feeling Akihiko’s cold breath on his face. Then he laughs, loud and ah, his cheeks hurt.

“What are you laughing at?” Akihiko groans and asks, but he never tells him to stop laughing. Because Akihiko doesn’t want him to stop laughing, and he knows that.

“Nothing,” he responds. There really is nothing to be laughed at.

There’s just this bubbly feeling in his chest, a weird sensation that tickles him, and so he just laughs. It happens all the time when he’s with Akihiko. Everything seems funny; the smallest silly thing with Akihiko is funnier than it’d be with anyone else. A soft look from Akihiko makes his heart thumps loud and he’s happy and he’s laughing. Then he’d laugh more.

He’s feeling so _much_.

“Why are you laughing even more?” Akihiko looks like he’s annoyed and yet he still hasn’t told him to stop.

He leans on Akihiko’s chest, and it suddenly feels warm. Both his arms are put on Akihiko’s back and now it feels so right. “Aki… the apartment’s clock is broken. Let’s go buy a new one.”

“Hasn’t it been broken for years, though?”

“Hm… I think it’s finally a good time to replace it.”

That cycle is now over.

They’re not going to repeat it again.

It’s a good time to let the time start ticking again now. Because now, he is ready to accept himself. As a person who loves both violin and Akihiko. And this time, the happiness he feels whenever he’s with Akihiko doesn’t scare him anymore.

He can hear the clock ticking now.

In the future, when he turns back the pages, he’ll find the whole book is filled with Akihiko’s name. And the event tonight would not be any different.

It’s a story that takes place on a certain night, in autumn.

A story about them who once had fallen to the ground, and crushed. Yet they fall as a promise that the next season is coming. When they fall, they fall together. And when another season comes, they’ll welcome it together.

.

**_End._ **

**Author's Note:**

> In case you don’t know, aki means autumn in japanese. So in that scene where ugetsu says “because I like autumn” it double meaning as “because I like aki”.
> 
> I don’t know if this part seems different from the other parts because I left it for half a year, and I hope ugetsu’s characterisation is still in sync with previous parts. Not to mention not writing for so long makes me feel like I keep repeating the same word choice and sentence. I’m sorry. 
> 
> I’m especially glad that I could finally write my headcanon about why ugetsu laughs a LOT when he’s with akihiko. I always wanted to write about it but couldn’t find the place to put it in previous parts. I’m glad it’s here in this part. 
> 
> Also, originally I wanted to finish this series with akigetsu kiss! But then as I write it, I feel like I’d be forcing it if they kissed at the end lmao I think both of them are not the type to express their emotions through actions, but more with subtle body language, the way they talk, behave, touch, and look at each other. Maybe that’s also why writing them is so fun, because I’m trying to convey all they’re feeling through those. I love writing kisses but I’m glad I did not force them, and give them a story that belongs only to them instead.
> 
> So, it’s finally a closure to this series. I want to make it seem like it really is the end, hence ugetsu remembering his past, present happening, also taking the step to welcome the future. Also I referenced the bits from previous parts in this, since what they’re facing in each part are linked in a way to help them grow and take this step, I hope you notice them. Most of them are from the first part though, and a little from third part. Second part is akihiko’s pov so it wasn’t in the narration but only in akihiko’s actions. 
> 
> Hm, for those of you who followed this series since I uploaded them, I really want to thank you! It really gives me the motivation to finish this series. I really enjoyed writing every part and exploring their characters, especially ugetsu! But knowing people liked reading them makes me love this series even more.
> 
> And for those of you who had just recently read this series, thank you! I hope you all enjoyed this series!


End file.
